I am supposed to be writing a paper (more of a project, really) that was due Friday at midnight. I can still turn it in, but I have been losing two points per day. The problem is, I don't really have any idea what I'm doing, and I know I should turn in something, but I feel like when I turn it in, it will become clear that I have very little idea of what much the first third of the class was about.
I have some writing and justification done, and it's not bad. I can write about stuff in a general, conceptual way. However, I have to have specifications, and justify each of those specifications. That is where I'm having trouble.
I didn't really blow off the paper last week. I had some physical issues, each one of them not particularly serious in itself, but one piled on top of another in a way that resulted in constant discomfort relieved by medication, and medication does not enhance the process of doing a project about stuff you don't really understand. On top of that, because of the unusual scheduling of the program in which I work, one session ended and another one started the very next day. Last week then, while I was sick, if that's what you could call it, I had to deal with giving finals, grading papers, calculating grades, etc.
I will do it, because my professor and my supervisor and my husband told me I should, but I hate, hate, hate this. I like to think of myself as a lifelong learner, but this project is making me feel punished, which is kind of weird.
I think this class, which I put off taking like I was supposed to do early in the program, has since become kind of a "weeding" class, and I have too much invested to allow that to happen. I believe I can do most of what is required in this class (although not with the success I have had in previous classes), but this particular project has become a real stumbling block. I think I should just consider it a typing/spreadsheet exercise, do the best with the content I can, and cull whatever points I can out of it. Some points are always better than no points.
